Has anyone seen my shoe?

Teenage Angst Communal Agony Aunt Thread

12645 posts in this topic

5. Be someone who is completely different to who you normally are. If your normally funny. Dont be. If your normally happy. Act sad.

I'm liking that one. The aim is to make her feel like shit for dumping me (ME! Who'd dump ME in their right mind?!?). So, I suppose I could put the sadact on.

Mummble words, cry? lol, never smile at anything and then the old 'I'll see you later...probably'. So she has to lie awake worrying like I f**king did.

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Firstly, be late. When you get to the meeting place, stop walking and make sure she notices you standing there with a sombre look on your face staring at her. When she makes eye contact, slowly turn around and start walking away.

Trust me, it's a heart breaker if she has any good in her (which I'm sure she does as you were with her for so long - she can't be a total bitch).

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I'm liking that one. The aim is to make her feel like shit for dumping me (ME! Who'd dump ME in their right mind?!?). So, I suppose I could put the sadact on.

Mummble words, cry? lol, never smile at anything and then the old 'I'll see you later...probably'. So she has to lie awake worrying like I f**king did.

Yea, then blame her because you have changed.

Firstly, be late.

AND BE LATE!!

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she can't be a total bitch

Aye, shes not a total bitch, but I was dumped for no reason what so ever. But she sees more and more of this lad.

Back when I was going out with her, If I asked her to stop at my house one night I got 'sorry, I can't I gotta stop at home' although it never stopped her going out on the piss with him and her mates.

She goes on 'walks' with him? What the f**k is that? lol. So, its my girlfriends turn first, and then his. It won't achieve anything, but I don't really give a toss so it should be a bit of a laugh.

I'm not an evil b*****d to anyone thats thinking that, I'm just sick of people f**king me about when I do nothing wrong to them. My girlfriend, I looked after her so f**king well, bought her anything she ever f**king wanted, new phones, ipod, gig tickets, clothes...simply because we were together for so long and I never expected her to break up with me.

She never asked for the stuff, but I bought it her because I love(d) her. But nooo, I'm not good enough anymore.

So if she thinks she can dump me and let it be a walk in the park, shes got another thing coming. The reason I need this help is because I'm always all happy cheery, and I can't really think of anything to make her upset.

I can picture it now, I'll do something like turn around to walk off...and just burst out laughing.

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Aye, shes not a total bitch, but I was dumped for no reason what so ever.

Complete contridiction(sp?). She sounds like a complete bitch if she dumped you for no reason. And then she says that she wants to be friends. She needs some serious sorting out.

Sounds like he also needs sorting out, Stealing your chick. Do you see him much? How about waiting till he is pissed. chain him to a lamp post and steal his clothes. He'll wake up in the morning...naked...how screwed is he...walking home with no clothes on...what a loser.

Hope this helps you mate,

From Lee

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Complete contridiction(sp?). She sounds like a complete bitch if she dumped you for no reason.

Yea, a bit of a contradiction. But she a girl, they're all evil, blood sucking vermin. She did dump me for no reason, it was bitchy, but I wouldn't say she was a COMPLETE bitch, its not like she treated me like shit throughout the whole relationship, she was a good girlfriend...just a bit of a bitch for dumping me...

But now its my turn :)

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I suppose your right......in a sad way.... :-

From lee

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get her to suck you off and 'acidentally' pull out at the last moment (you get the picture)... then pull up your trousers and walk away, that'll have the desired effect.

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Do you really need to do something harsh to her like laugh in her face, or pretend you're clinically depressed and blame it on her ?

From what you've said about it all, she was really out of order to you and majorly took you for granted which is utterly crap for you. But im sure shes not a completely evil, heartless bitch- something you've admitted yourself.

Cant you just go meet her, let her have her say (and possibly ask you back out?) and then just politely but very firmly tell her where to go with her offer. Have it out with her and tell her exactly how she made you feel and how good you were to her and why you can never take her back again. If you can tell it how it is well enough and describe exactly how crap everything she has done to you is, with enough assertiveness and confidence then she'll more than get the message. You went out with her for 3 years? surely you can be fairly civil about it?

Just prepare some strong words to say and stick to them. And adopt a stone cold glare at her too.

But maybe Im just soft ;)

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Do you really need to do something harsh to her like laugh in her face, or pretend you're clinically depressed and blame it on her?

Not exactly, but it'll make the situation a bit more fun. I wouldn't normally do this, and I wouldn't be doing it if it weren't for that other lad. I'm not certain thats shes with him, but she see's a lot of him (according to her mate) so I can't let her do that to me, just on principle.

Cant you just go meet her, let her have her say (and possibly ask you back out?)

Shes had her say, in an email she sent me basically saying it was over, with no reasoning. I asked a reason and got 'I dont think its going to work out'...no one says that after 3 years of being together.

I'm not a mug, I'm not going to take her back no matter what, simply because I can't allow her to think shes can move me about.

You went out with her for 3 years? surely you can be fairly civil about it?

I could...but wheres the fun in that? I'll probably just hear something I don't want to hear. Shes never ever said sorry to me for dumping me, and she appears to show no regret or emotion about the thing...so I'll try and make her :)

But maybe Im just soft ;)

I think so matey, lol. I understand where you're coming from. But I do realise theres plenty more fish in the sea, and if she doesnt want me, I'm not going to waste my time on her. So, I'll make the whole situation one big joke. I might not make her upset, I might do something completely random and mess her about. Eg. plan to meet her and not turn up.

Right. Plan.

I give someone on here my number, you get your missus (Either that or pretend to be a girl) to ring me at 8pm. And basically talk on the phone, really loudly so my ex can her the girls voice over my phone. And then I go 'love you too' and hang up.

That'll make her stomach drop.

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ok fair enough its up to you what you do. I actually dont think what I was suggested was soft.... probably just the mature thing to do. I didnt realise she had already had her say (probably should have guessed) so just tell her (not softly softly really drum it into her) what a bitch she has been and say theres no way in hell you'd take her back. Why is that soft ? Just cos you dont go wearing a pair of wacky glasses with eyes painted on them, or a crazy clown hooter to let off every time she trys to speak?

If you really must be harsh to her then just say you'll meet up with her and dont turn up and never speak to her again. Thats fair enough. But laughing in her face or honking a clown hooter (:P) just seems like it would be better suited to the playground.

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Yea, I'm 18 but act 12...maybe thats her reason? lol

But laughing in her face or honking a clown hooter (:P) just seems like it would be better suited to the playground.

I can meet her in a playground, its not a problem. :P

I know you think I'm an immature pillock, but theres no way were going to be friends or go back out with each other, so this will technically be the last time I see her...may aswell go out in style...in the style of an immature twat.

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Nah I can see your reasoning in a way, as I'd have similar thoughts running through my mind if my gf did a similar thing. Nothing wrong with a bit of immaturity from time to time- look at me I go on pub crawls dressed as a Mexican (hardly the height of maturity). I wouldnt do it personally but, fair enough as long as you dont take it too far.

Please take a comedy clown air hooter and let it off every time she trys to speak :P

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Please take a comedy clown air hooter and let it off every time she trys to speak :P

Banned in the UK now aren't they? Too many people using them on their ex-girlfriends?

Edit: Opps, I was thinking of the big air horn ones.

Edited by anzo

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Well actually you were right as I was thinking of an air horn, but wanted to give it more of a comical name. Anyway I'm off to the truckfest in Ipswich with Michael, before I have to warn myself for an MSN style convo in here. Good luck with sorting your little problem.

Ipswich ahoy. (Timmy Mallet is opening the one in Skegness but it will never be as good)

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Well actually you were right as I was thinking of an air horn, but wanted to give it more of a comical name. Anyway I'm off to the truckfest in Ipswich with Michael, before I have to warn myself for an MSN style convo in here. Good luck with sorting your little problem.

Ipswich ahoy. (Timmy Mallet is opening the one in Skegness but it will never be as good)

Dave, your talking to a man who uses a collective term for a single veichle!

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Get with her, ask for head/blowjob/whatever you wanna call it, And fart when shes doing the buisness.

Scared. For. Life.

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Is that talking from experience babes?

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Yeah, Can't believe you pumped one out on me babez.

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Top Trumping

You wait till I get my pot noodle horn

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Diz IsNT Ze3 MsNZzz!!11111one!!1

stop it now, forum whore.

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Firstly, be late. When you get to the meeting place, stop walking and make sure she notices you standing there with a sombre look on your face staring at her. When she makes eye contact, slowly turn around and start walking away.

Trust me, it's a heart breaker if she has any good in her (which I'm sure she does as you were with her for so long - she can't be a total bitch).

Similar to smo's idea

Or be there early (she won't know how early, lie and say u waited ages, make her think you still like her and you were excitied blah blah) only when your there, stand away from wherever you were ment 2 be eyes down etc, and then rip from the rest of smo's idea. and then start talking 2 her properly blah blah make her guilty as fook and then properly go...

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my mums being a cow, does that count to go in here?

Also my 2 ex's are fighting between themselves. Im supposed to be supporting them and stopping them from arguing but in all fairness i really be be arsed and its more fun watching them

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Hey, hey guys. I got dumped aout 2 months ago by my girlfriend who I'd been with 13 months. No warning, no good reason, just 'I like someone else' Its preaty shit realy, coming from someone who had already started planning that we were gunna go to the same uni (we're only in the first year of college/a-levels!). It hit me preaty hard and that night I just got compleatly f**ked on anything I could find (erm... cider teachers whisky and some funky flapjacks if i remember what my mates told me). the whole thing f**ked me up a bit realy, I mean, i thought I properly loved her, and then she does this to me!

Well I'm over her and all that shit now, but its fu*king weird veing single again after that long and I realy miss the companionship and all that bollocks.

My current problem however is that I now realy realy like this girl, who I've known and liked a bit for ages, but she has a serious boyfriend. It's so anoying, as soon as I become single, she stops being single! But the main problem is, I realy realy like her, and I cant have her, and its eating at me soo much. It's fu*king anoing!!! I'm not gunna try and split em up or anything, because that would realy upset her, and I know how he'd feel having just had someone steel my girlfriend, and on top of it all he's a realy nice guy who doesnt deserve it! why couldnt he have just been an asswhole, than I'd have no objection!

Anyone got any ideas of what to do, I can't realy see a possible solution to be honest, besides wait, or intuduse him to a realy nice girl, and hope he f**ks her over for the new girl. But I'm preaty sure he's too nice to do that, and I cant think of anyone who would be worth dumping her for anyway.

I'll stop ranting now, as no'one cares.

And feel free to ridicule (spl?) me, I could do with a laugh, college is boring as.

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Personally, I'd suggest not going out with your friends. I rate my mates higher than any girlfriend, simply because I know my mates stick by me no matter what and they'll most probably be there for the rest of my life in some way, so to f**k that up with a relationship seems stupid.

So, if she is your mate, and you got with her, it all crashed and burnt, you lost a mate and a girlfriend. Which you obviously don't want. On the other hand, you could get with her and be with her 'forever' (pfttt...lovely dovey bullshit) as people always say, friendship is a good foundation for a 'relationship'.

Only you can decide really, but personally, I wouldn't bother. I know a girl who likes me a lot, I could text her right now and be banging her brains out by 7pm tonight...but...shes a mate, and I just know her too well for any shit like that.

As you may know, I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years. I've been out with people I 'kinda knew well' before, and to be honest, its just a bit boring. Its much more fun and exciting to meet someone completely new, someone you've never met.

This way, you have a lot more to learn about them, you get to meet their other friends (she might have a better looking friend) and shizzle like that.

But hey, whatever floats your boat. But to conclude, I'd say forget about it, especially if shes in a serious relationship. It'll never last because he'll constantly be at her to get back with him, she'll always be connected with him in some way, you'll probably get your head kicked in, she might refuse you and you'll look a twat...you get the gist?

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