Anon13425636453

Cheers for all these responses guys. I've cleaned my room and started talking to my best mate about it, cheered me up but I'm still having these thoughts on a night. Sleeping pattern is difficult to get out of, I've been going to bed much earlier but still not able to get to sleep until early hours :/ I tend to feel a little better now when I know there's someone to talk to, but the night's are still really bad

Thankyou so much for the replies guys, I really appreciate your help.

That's the good news I had, got in at the college just need a company. I got told in my interview I have exceptional English skills and scored one of the highest this year in the aptitude test, so companies will be wanting me rather me begging for a placement. But if i f8ck up my A-levels/ drop out my dad will flip on me... He got a letter from my college about my work and my bike was locked up because of it if I get kicked off every course he'll probably take an angle grinder to it.. He's not the most understanding of people and ends up flipping before i can give him an explanation Anyway, this is the last post from me, new member restrictions and all..

Cheers for the reply, Well my sleeping pattern is f*cked up... And the homeless live in better conditions than my room... I'll get them sorted asap, thanks again for the reply.

You're going to get sick of topics like this, but this is something that I really need some help on. And given you weren't all wankers to the guy that made the "thoughts on self-harm" topic It's given me some confidence to talk about it to someone. I've found the rest of the internet to not have much help and before going to a GP about it I'd prefer to get some help off you here. Plus (and this is going to sound terrible) but I don't actually feel comfortable enough to talk about this to my parents :/ So for the past few years I've felt down, and we all feel down from time to time so I've just dismissed it all the time :/ But it's not until the past 5 months or so I've found it getting much worse up to the point of having regular suicidal thoughts. I've got no motivation to do anything, my college work has got worse simply because I've just done none of it, I've been threatened to be taken off every course which just keeps making me feel worse. I've even lost motivation in my riding, I've found when I get asked on rides I'm always coming up with excuses as why not to go, Don't get me wrong, I still go on rides, and I still love riding, but when I'm not riding, although spending an unhealthy amount of time on trials-forum, I'm not eager to get out again :/ Which isn't as it used to be since I had sleepless nights excited about rides before :/ I've been a dick to all my friends, lost some friends because of it. Recently things have been looking up for me (had some incredible news) but it hasn't made me feel better, I was happy for a brief moment but just went back to my room and cried for no reason :/ Does anyone have any advise on how to deal with it? Before having to talk to my parents about it :/ And if anyone has guessed who I am please don't say anything negative or mention my name :/ I'm just glad there's a place like this I can come to for issues other than "trials" issues