Ingram Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 (edited) ooo just though of another, Whats hard and dry when it goes in, and wet and sogy when it comes out..... Chewing Gum! Edited April 15, 2005 by Ingram Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matthewholdsworth Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 why is a girl like a tornado??? because when she comes shes wet and wild, and when she goes she takes your house and car Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RicH_87 Posted April 15, 2005 Report Share Posted April 15, 2005 (edited) Whats the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?.... One was the first man to walk on the moon, The other f**ks little boys in the ass. --------------------- Why did Michael Jackson spread dareliegh on hi cock?... Cos' kids'll do anything for dareliegh. -------------------- Whats Pink and Bubbley?......... A baby in a microwave. :blink:" -------------------- Whats black and blue and doesn't like sex? A rape victim. :(" (ooo contraversial) Edited April 18, 2005 by RicH_87 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aust Posted April 16, 2005 Report Share Posted April 16, 2005 (edited) how many jews can you get in a mini ???? 3 in the back 2 in the front and 3000 in the ashtray whats blue and lies at the bottom of a swimming pool ?? a baby with no arm bands Edited April 16, 2005 by aust Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
froggy Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Why did the peice of grass leave home? ...........Cause his dad was a sod :( .... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ingram Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Why did the peice of grass leave home? ...........Cause his dad was a sod :( .... ← LOL! THAT SHOULD WIN!!! :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Nichols Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Two oranges are rolling down a hill one stops and says "where do you live?" The other one says "I'm not telling you, you might come round and rob my washing." ← Don't get it. Moths..just think about them, you will soon laugh ← Don't get it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScotchDave Posted April 17, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 (edited) how many jews can you get in a mini ???? 3 in the back 2 in the front and 3000 in the ashtray whats blue and lies at the bottom of a swimming pool ?? a baby with no arm bands ← IT's 6 million in the ashtray. And I take personal offence at that. :( Edited April 17, 2005 by div Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montstar Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Why are there no Pain-Killers in the Jungle? Cos The 'Parrots-ceet-amol' :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrMonkey Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 how many jews can you get in a mini ???? 3 in the back 2 in the front and 3000 in the ashtray ← f**k me that's a bit over the top. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali C Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 how many jews can you get in a mini ???? 3 in the back 2 in the front and 3000 in the ashtray ← I dont get it a man with a speach disorder was shopping. First he goes to the bakery "can I have a bum please" he says "dont you mean a bun?" says the baker "yeah, thats right" He then goes to the iron monger "can I have a f**ket please" he says "dont you mean bucket?" says the monger "yeah thats right" He then goes to the clock shop "can I have a cock please" he says "dont you mean a clock?" says the attendant "yeah thats right" he was then walking home and a man asks him for the time "sure" he says "just hold my bum and f**ket while I get my cock out" :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tomm Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 I dont get it ← Think Holocaust... Very bad taste though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali C Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 ok, I aint one for history really :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam Nichols Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Hardly history Ali! It's just one of those things everyone should be aware of! :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onza-Ash Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 okay, so theres this guy walking down a road in camouflage...and someone walks into him, he says "sorry mate, i didnt see you there". HAHAHAHA! :( Ash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
club_card Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 knock knock whos there? Tony Tony who? Tony blair! :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScotchDave Posted April 17, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Just got a quick wee point. I looked up Blair in the shorter oxford english dictionary (2 huge volumes) and I found this. Blair: To make loud unfocused noises. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazy_gap girl Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 i have ooooonne!! guy: walks onto a bus with a newt on his shoulder bus driver says: what do you call him? guy says: "tiny" bus driver says: why's that?? guy: because he's my newt of course.. :P i know..i know :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali C Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Hardly history Ali! It's just one of those things everyone should be aware of! :P ← I knew you'd say that :P" I am just thickle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScotchDave Posted April 17, 2005 Author Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Nah, your not thick Ali, this is a shortcoming of today's society, they think it happened 60 years ago, it's not relevant, but it always happens again. This is a list off the top of my heasd of people who have massacred jews not a very comprehensive list, but it gives a basic idea: poles, russians, spanish, christians, crusaders. Also not having a go at anyone just pointing out some facts. *Waits for Sameer to turn up and say the holocaust never happened.* And anyway this is a joke competition enough of the serious stuff. Jokes people and bad ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shity_saracen_rider Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 What do you call a man with a bird on his head..... cliff :P jamie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
damo Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 Two muffins were inside an oven, one says to the other its getting hot in here. The other replies ahhhhhhhhh a talking muffin :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RicH_87 Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 what do you call a man with a buket on his head?..... Twat. Why did the man fall of his bike?..... Cos' someone threw a fridge at him. There, that pretty much sums up bad jokes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Will Arnold Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 why dont we change this a bit, its getting boring with people listing jokes. i'll start it off, i say the start to a joke and someone else has to finnish it off correctly before they can put the start of their own joke in? here i go........ whats yellow and banana shaped? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RicH_87 Posted April 17, 2005 Report Share Posted April 17, 2005 a bananna? if thats right.... What's Long, Hard and full of Seamen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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