adamtrials

She's almost certainly taking the piss to some extent, so this calls for dirty tactics. On a number of occasions i've "nicked" their phone ("oh dear you must have left it at mine"), this way you've hit the mother lode and can usually get a very clear picture of what's going on. This is almost certainly going to be the most effective method. Alternatively you could sneak peeks at his fbook page on her account while she's in the shower or something and see what she's written/ check for dodgy messages. This works quite well, even better try and look what her password is so you can get real time updates wherever you are...

I salute you

In the immortal words of Toyah Wilcox; It's a mystery.

Anyone else just think of that game where you have to kill off the entire world population with a virus/ bacteria/ parasite when you hear about swine flu?

OH HI I FOUND THIS WEBSITE THAT HAS A GUARANTEED GENUINE METHOD TO FIX ALL YOUR CAR PROBLEMS Isn't that right Mr Joshua531

I f**king wish i'd bought some shares in Roche...

£0.00 :/

More to the point, I'd like to see what they can do about a guy whose name they don't know, causing damage in an unknown station, that may or may not be in London... Trawl through the whole night's CCTV for every station in London looking for someone crouching over an bike (don't even know what bike it is?) for 10-15 seconds?

YO DAWG I HEARD YOU LIKE SHIT JOKES, SO I PUT A RICKY GERVAIS TAPE IN YO CASETTES SO YOU CAN CHUCKLE WHILE YOU DRIVE.

Just watch a series of pimp my ride, it'll tell you basically everything you need to know, dawg.

Damaging their lock is criminal damage I would imagine. Just take it to the local papers if you get caught, it's clearly a daft policy.

That is so stupid. I'd love to see them enforce the policy at Cambridge station in term time, it's actual bike mayhem there... But yeah, go for it, just be careful locking the same bike up in future...

Invite her to a party/ somewhere where alcohol is involved, gets things going much faster than all that talking crap... I'm in a f**king weird situation right now, wanna be properly with this girl but I don't think I can trust her. Also within 5 hours of meeting her I was in a threesome with her and her best friend, now I'm having trouble getting the friend out of the equation. Her friend is f**king scum, complete sponger who doesn't appreciate anything anyone does for her (owes me about £50 in the last month alone and I'm never going to get that back) and has a habit of screwing everything up, I can't even begin to describe what a f**kup she is, but I'm sure she'd manage to ruin my relationship. (she's an old friend of my ex and contributed to the screwing up of that too). I can't quite remember what the point of this rant is, think I need to steer clear of Telford girls...

Your in joke is lost on me.

Anyone on here ever given a donkey punch? I'm intrigued...

Get a secondhand cannondale, you can't beat the "where's my fork leg gone" look...

Ding ding ding, we have a winner Would you rather get paid £400 to star in a gay porn film which is then seen by everyone you know, or cut off your knob. The first part happened to a guy in my year back in school...

Hopefully Marco, tv chefs need excessive swearing, not mystique...

Shell island, it's a few miles north of barmouth next to llanbedr, on a sunny day it has to be one of the best beaches in Britain, you can usually walk away south from where the shit munchers congregate and get to a point where there's noone else in site. Girls love it there, you could even camp if that's your thing. Just don't walk too far south like I did once and end up at the uk's largest gay nudist/ dogging spot... I'm taking someone there once the weather gets reasonable again.

Madeline Mccann

Some girl seems to think we're together and has told people that we are... Bad times, I actually refuse to meet her in daylight as she's that dire

No copy and paste?

I've had about 20 pms from different members who this has worked for thanking me, obviously they don't want to post in here though as the admins will know who self validated themselves then... It does work though, I'd post a link to the page but can't as I'm on my iPhone. Good luck guys!

Hi guys, As a wiki mod I've found a bug that allows you to validate yourself on the wiki, and at the same time this makes you a full member on the forum! How can this be true? Well as I'm sure you know, anyone can change anything on a wiki, and it would appear our esteemed administrators forgot that this includes the power to upgrade your membership group. It really is that simple. Just click on the 'wiki' link at the top of the page, click on 'member settings' once the wiki loads, and if you can't find the 'validate member' button, then to be honest, you don't deserve to be validated! After this has been pressed you should instantly be validated, and you'll be selling all your shite in the main forum in no time. You'll have to be pretty quick, tomturd will no doubt get rid of this loophole once he wakes up and sees this... Peace and f**king, believe.

My ex seems to have disappeared off the planet Noone's heard from her by text for ages, and she hasn't been on facebook since thursday which is weird considering what an avid facebooker she is (she goes on it on her iphone all the time). Mysterious... Guess this is less of a girl trouble and more of a positive though