*gentlydoesit Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 (edited) The title says it all really Had some funny lines told to me at work today... Boy "Fancy a 68?" Girl "what's that" boy "gimme a blowjob and ill owe you one" Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body... Fancy another? If you know any worse than those then whack 'em here Edited November 22, 2013 by f**megently Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
williams Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 - I heard you where a gryffinwhore because you let every wizzard slyther-in. - How far would 20 get me? - Should I buy you a drink or do you just want the money? You got BAD ones Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Zulu Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Not sure it's so much as a chat up line, just offensive; - How much does a polar bear weigh? - Enough to break the ice? - Nope, not as much as you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ross McArthur Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Im sorry, I can only sponsor you a tenner. A tenner? For what? Oh, sorry, are you not doing Movember? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew62 Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Im sorry, I can only sponsor you a tenner. A tenner? For what? Oh, sorry, are you not doing Movember? I thought you'd use something like : "reet doll, wanna swatch of me boaby"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luke Dunstan Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 I hope you have pet insurance, because your pussy is about to get smashed. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*gentlydoesit Posted November 22, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Alright babe, wanna go halfs on a b*****d? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HippY Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 I am pretty good with compressed files. Let me unzip your pants My servers never go down. but I do Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ash-Kennard Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 There is only going to be seven planets left after I destroy UrAnus. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.KYDD Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Get in the van 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trialsiain Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Did you fall from heaven ? cause your face looks pretty f**ked up! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzatpro09 Posted November 22, 2013 Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Get in the van Dang it, you beat me to it. I'll post it anyway Roses are red, Violets are blue, Get in the f***ing van, Or I will axe-murder you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*gentlydoesit Posted November 22, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 (edited) My cock died... can I bury it in your vagina Edited November 22, 2013 by f**megently 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*gentlydoesit Posted November 22, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2013 Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you? been chuckling about this all day. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Zulu Posted November 24, 2013 Report Share Posted November 24, 2013 Roses are red, Violets are twisted. Bend over love, You're about to get fisted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AkuskaUK Posted November 25, 2013 Report Share Posted November 25, 2013 Hi, I'm Dax. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dann2707 Posted November 26, 2013 Report Share Posted November 26, 2013 Hi, I'm Dax. Surely any girl would run away if confronted by that name? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Gibbs Posted November 26, 2013 Report Share Posted November 26, 2013 I lost my Virginity........ Can I have yours? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AkuskaUK Posted November 26, 2013 Report Share Posted November 26, 2013 Surely any girl would run away if confronted by that name? It what makes the chase that bit more fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
err Posted November 27, 2013 Report Share Posted November 27, 2013 Do you like chicken? Have a go on this, it's foul Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bikeperson45 Posted November 27, 2013 Report Share Posted November 27, 2013 "Hi, I'm a trials rider" 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onzatpro09 Posted November 27, 2013 Report Share Posted November 27, 2013 (edited) *me having a civilised conversation with my friend about genital warts* "oh my god you're so hench! Can I have your autograph? How old are you?" says random woman, about 69. "I'm 14" I replied, getting my muscles out. "WTF? How can you be so ripped at 14? I've been at the grocery store and my melons are so heavy, would you mind carrying them? ;)" Then I say "What a great offer but not today." She was so sad, her heavy melons drooping loosely around her knees. Okay, I know the resemblance between me and Johnny Depp is uncanny but I didn't expect to be hit on by a pensioner. It was wierd because I never get asked to touch ladies melons, EVER. I regret turning her offer down now. Oh how I miss Edna. Hopefully our paths will cross again one day and I can caress her beautiful melons. Happy now? Edited November 28, 2013 by onzatpro09 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*gentlydoesit Posted November 28, 2013 Author Report Share Posted November 28, 2013 ^Just bizzar^ why didn't you tell her your 14 and a half, could have made all the difference Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duncy H Posted November 28, 2013 Report Share Posted November 28, 2013 Do you have any Yorkshire in you? No Would you like some? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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